Not sure what to take to the Federal Election Party you’ve been invited to on May 18?
These might work:
Mini Pork Barrels – great treat for those in marginal seats
Don Chips – an all-time favourite to keep the bastards honest
Some Greens – you know they’re good for you
Raw onions – popular in Warringah
Cold Democracy Sausage – pork, lamb, beef, chicken, kangaroo and tofu all minced together with so much garlic and chili you won’t have clue what your eating.
Free Trade Gluten Free Locovarian Vegan Nibblies – don’t worry if no one eats them, the chooks might give ‘em a shot the next morning
Halal Raspberry Tart – available exclusively from the fish and chip shop in Ipswich, just ask for Pauline
Bowl of Mixed Nuts – pick up some at Fraser Anning’s next rally.
Mashed Potato Head – Skin Dutton, Boil Dutton, Mash Dutton, hopefully this dish will be gone by 7pm AEST election night.
Cheese and Frackers – they’re a gas, gas, gas, all proceeds go to buying back puddle water from the Cayman Islands
Pigs in Blankets – Michaelia Cash is screaming about these
Little Boys – favourites of Family First and the Christian Democrats
Chicken Wings – left and right wings on separate plates please.
Frankingfurters – absolutely super!